He Who Saw the Deep
by JadeDixon
Summary: Ventus went to sleep, but occasionally he woke up. And sometimes, just sometimes, he was able to nudge things along to help on Sora's journey.
1. He Who Saw the Deep

**Disclaimer**: Kingdom Hearts is the property of Square-Enix and Disney. I don't own it, nor do I pretend that I do. Even if I did, the army of lawyers that would come after me would make me change my mind. Title shamelessly stolen from the Old Babylonian title for the Gilgamesh epic.

He Who Saw the Deep  
>A Kingdom Hearts Fanfiction<br>By Jade Dixon

**Note on Canon**: The original three games are required background. This is heavily based on Birth By Sleep, and includes spoilers for the Final Episode, but not Blank Points (the last video you get from completing the character journals) or any Final Mix footage. 358/2 Days is not referenced (excepted briefly and vaguely in Roxas' deleted scene), and Re:Coded doesn't apply.

* * *

><p>Ven settled into Sora's Heart, the child's Light encompassing him with warmth, and went to sleep. Just as the boy had predicted years earlier, Ven had reclaimed the part of his own Heart that had been stolen away, but it would take time to reintegrate the fractured shards he'd been left with in the battle.<p>

His body was safe, Aqua had seen to that.

A twinge of discomfort disturbed his fall into rest; Aqua had also disappeared. Hopefully, she'd find Terra soon. She shouldn't be alone...

He pulled the warmth around him like a blanket, and knew no more.

* * *

><p>Something was wrong.<p>

Something was disturbing Sora's Heart.

Ven stirred weakly, extending his senses. Sora was dreaming, perhaps it was just a nightmare, then? Sleep tried to drag him down—he wasn't ready yet—but he fought to stay aware. Something wasn't right...

There was Power in this dream... In fact, it felt like the Passing of Power; the ritual to activate a student's potential to wield a Keyblade.

Ven remembered Master Xehanort performing the ritual with him. He'd been—_bzzzzzt_—

He'd been home... His younger brother had been stuck home with a cold... He was annoyed. He'd found a new garden, and there was an _awesome_ tree for climbing. He couldn't wait to show Cloud, but Mom said he had to wait until the cold went away.

Master Xehanort had casually fallen into pace with him as he'd trotted along one of the promenades, fighting off imaginary bandits.

Ven remembered smiling up at the man, asking if he was lost.

He'd been ten.

He remembered his mother's tears, and the tight hug she'd given him, as Master Xehanort—an old acquaintance—convinced Dad that there was danger out there, and that Ven had the power to help fight it. That their little boy leaving to train with the older man was the best thing for everyone.

He'd been very charismatic.

Coldness seeped into Ven for the first time since he'd taken residence in Sora's Heart. The Power... Master Xehanort...?

He extended his senses, trying to figure out who was passing the power to the young boy...

...but found no others nearby. Just the Power.

And Light.

Soothed, Ven fell back into sleep.

* * *

><p>It felt like he'd barely slept when he was disturbed again. Not by Light this time, but Darkness. It was everywhere, trying to consume the World, much like Vanitas remembered trying to consume their Heart while they'd been separate.<p>

The Heartless were closing in on Sora, but the boy's Light held strong.

It wouldn't be enough on its own.

Ven reached out, lending an echo of a memory to his host.

Sora summoned his Keyblade for the first time.

Trembling with exhaustion from the simple action, Ven let his consciousness go, and fell back into slumber.

When next he became aware, when his strength had been restored a bit, it was because he was not alone.

Sora's Light had always been strong, but like all Hearts, his had gained a few wisps of Darkness as he got older. Not even as much as Ventus had had when his own Heart had been broken the first time, but a little.

The intruder had no Darkness. The intruder was awake and aware.

But not of Ven.

Ven's Heart had been with Sora so long, they were practically indistinguishable while Ven was dormant; and Ven was still healing, he still needed to sleep.

The newcomer meant no harm, and her added warmth helped to lull the young wielder back into sleep.

Soon.

* * *

><p>But not soon enough.<p>

The Princess had meant no harm, but she had underestimated Sora's love for her. Sora didn't wait to find a safer route to excise Kairi from his Heart; he tore open his own to free her.

Sora was slipping away in bits and pieces, and Ven was frantically trying to hold them together.

For the first time since he'd begun to sleep, he watched the world through Sora's eyes, used his own Heart to try to hold onto Sora's body, and tried to ensconce the bright boy's Heart within his own to save it.

Ven succeeded long enough to see the Keyhole completed and Kairi awaken, and then his strength gave out. Sora slipped between the cracks that hadn't quite been sealed in Ven's dormant Heart, and began to fall into the Dark.

Ven dived after him. He grabbed hold, and folded himself around the other boy, keeping Sora's Darkness and Light from dissipating, even if he couldn't keep it whole. When Sora reformed as a Heartless, his Soul was still partially there—enough to give awareness.

Ven felt the strain on his own Heart, felt partially healed cracks beginning to refracture. But he refused to let go. Sora had saved him—twice!—and if the boy was going to fall, they'd go together.

Kairi, the Princess who'd started the whole mess in the first place, saved them. She grabbed Sora tight, and her Light fused his Heart back together, allowing his body to reform.

The bits that had been lost couldn't be recovered, but at least they had been lost in balance, and Sora wouldn't share Ven's fate with Vanitas.

Sora would be alright, a bit weaker than before, but he would live.

Ven dove deep into his Light, buried himself in it, and swore that he would _never_ wake up if this was the cost. Sora was too important, he could feel that; he'd been shown that. Ven let himself drift into sleep, and the newly wrought damage began to heal.

* * *

><p>As soon as they had approached Kingdom Hearts, Ven could feel it. He curled deeper into Sora's Light, and trembled in fear.<p>

This was the Power behind the χ-blade that had torn his Heart in two. This was the Power his Heart had been shattered twice over to achieve.

He floated, surrounded by Sora's Light for a few moments, but could not force his consciousness into dormancy again. If he'd had a body, it would have been pumping adrenaline.

_If this is my end,_ Ven thought to himself, _I want to face it with my eyes wide open._ He uncurled himself from Sora's core, and tapped into the boy's senses, seeing through his eyes and hearing through his ears.

_If this is Sora's end, he won't face it alone._

The man—Ansem he called himself—was familiar. Those clothes were just like...

...Master Xehanort's. Had he found a new student? Had Terra failed?

Except, his words were Master Xehanort's... But his voice and his face... The hair was all wrong...

_Terra?_

Something was wrong. Terra wouldn't do this; he wouldn't _hurt_ people for some selfish desire. Even when he'd fought Master Eraqus, it had been to save _Ven_.

Ven reached out with his Heart, desperate to touch Ansem's, to find out the truth...

And recoiled in shock after the briefest of touches.

This man... He was a Heartless! His Heart's Light had been completely overwhelmed; how had he managed to keep both form and consciousness?

Ven cautiously reached out again, more prepared this time, and managed a more thorough look before needing to retreat again.

Two Hearts. One, almost complete Darkness with only a scrap of Light. It was familiar; that Same oily charisma that had approached him as a child. Master Xehanort had found an escape from his degrading body.

The other...

He wanted to cry.

The other Heart was strong; although the Darkness was rooted deeper than in most Hearts, its Light still shone brightly.

Terra.

Master Xehanort's scrap of Light had hooked itself into Terra's, a tool of the man's Darkness, and so the older man leeched off of his host's Heart so that the Darkness couldn't control him like it would most Heartless.

Much like Ven had saved Sora not so long ago.

Master Xehanort—that is, Ansem—clutched at his chest, gravely weakened by Sora and his friends. Ven could sense Terra's Heart fighting back, grasping for control of his body, even as Ansem reached out for the Darkness of Kingdom Hearts. Ven flared his own Light, camouflaged as it was within Sora's Heart.

_Fight, Terra! Don't give up!_

* * *

><p>Sora watched helplessly as Darkness spilled out from the grand Doors. They had barely defeated Ansem as it was, how could they hope to win if he gained the Heart of Darkness?<p>

He felt his own Light rallying—he'd been able to notice it easier ever since Hollow Bastion—and thought of Kairi's story: a light in the darkness. His eyes widened and hope bloomed in his chest.

"You're wrong," he challenged the wounded man, and raised his own hand to his Heart.

"I know now, without a doubt," floating in the darkness, he ignored Ansem and called out to the Heart of All Worlds.

"Kingdom Hearts is Light!"

* * *

><p>The Light, the purest most beautiful Light that Ven had ever seen washed over them all.<p>

Sora's Heart had sheltered him almost as long as he'd lived in the real world. The boy's Light had sustained him and given him comfort. It had been the clean Light of a child, and the warm Light of a truly good person.

This Light, was like being born again.

The fractures in his Heart that had yet to heal, or had been cracked again recently, smoothed over and his Heart was whole once more. After ten years, "Ven" and "Vanitas" became merely "Ventus".

And when the Light disappeared, and Terra was nowhere to be seen, Ventus didn't worry. There had been no cruelty in that Light, no divine retribution.

Terra was out there somewhere, and Ventus would find him again someday.

* * *

><p>When Sora rejected his home to search for his friend, Ventus understood completely.<p>

After all, wasn't that what Ven had done, so long ago when Terra had left on his mission?

Sora's promise to return had hurt, however.

Ven's homecoming had been far more painful than Sora's promised to be.

Yet Ventus still yearned for that land, where he'd gained a second family, where he'd been given a home. His departure had never been meant to be permanent. He wondered if Aqua had returned, waiting for him to wake up...

When Goofy and Donald joined Sora in their determination to find their King, and denied their journey home, there was only one World left they could be deposited on.

Between one moment and the next, they stepped from barren ground to a grassy path.

To the trio, it was just a random world they had never visited before.

For Ventus, it was home.

* * *

><p>His Heart mended, Ventus refused to fall back into sleep. He wanted to see everything, experience everything, Sora experienced. He was tired of sleeping, and if he couldn't live his own life, he would gladly observe Sora's quest. Given the glimpses he'd been woken for, he thought it would be exciting.<p>

It was terrifying.

The citadel had changed. The last he saw of it was as the Portal Terra had shoved him through had closed. He knew that Master Eraqus had fallen, expected the grounds to be a bit neglected with only Aqua watching over them.

But it wasn't his home that they found.

The castle was twisted, there was something _off _about it, that he couldn't quite put a finger on. When his eyes tried to follow the lines of the towers, they'd twist to the side, as if what they were seeing wasn't real.

The blankness inside brought a chill to his bones. It reminded him of the first few weeks he had lived here; not because the castle had looked like that, but because _he_ had been blank like that.

And Aqua wasn't the only one there; in fact he didn't sense her Heart at all. There were just the empty strangers in the dark coats, and they looked so familiar... He thought he once saw Master Xehanort wear something like it, but he couldn't recall when. He felt a tug, his body trying to reclaim him, but refused its call; Sora could not fall again.

Except that he did. Floor by floor, Sora fell to pieces, and there was nothing that Ventus could do to stop it. He curled himself around Sora's Heart once more, just like when the other boy had fallen into the Dark, but it didn't help at all, even when he retreated fully into Sora.

So when Sora reached the top, and was put to sleep, Ventus wasn't prepared to fight it off, and fell into sleep with him, still curled around the other's Heart.

* * *

><p>When Sora woke up, so did Ventus, and he could immediately tell that things had changed drastically from when he went to sleep.<p>

Sora's Heart was whole again, the pieces damaged back home had been restored and the false imprints removed. In fact, Ventus floated within Sora's Light and extended his senses—in fact, Sora's Heart was _healthier_than it'd been since Hollow Bastion. A closer examination showed that the pieces Ventus hadn't been able to keep from being lost to the Dark had been found and put back in place.

Except...

Except they didn't fit together seamlessly, like they should, and Ventus could feel the echo of a presence ghosting in the back of Sora's mind. It didn't feel malicious, not like Vanitas' remnants had at first; more... wistful. Ventus resolved to keep an eye on it, but returned to living through Sora.

* * *

><p>The brief exchange Sora had with Mickey warmed Ventus through, even if it left Sora more frustrated than not. It was the first person Ventus had seen from his old life, and he was glad his friend survived Master Xehanort's machinations.<p>

The warmth didn't last long though. Sora held up a blue bauble, watching the sunlight shine through, and those returned pieces _shifted_, and for a few brief seconds, that wistful presence came to the fore before fading back—it felt like it was saying good-bye.

It didn't _do_anything, there was no malicious intent, but it made Ventus worry.

He worried more when the pieces shifted a bit again just before Sora boarded the train, sorrow rising enough that a tear fell down the Keyblade Master's face. The pieces went dormant then, but Ventus became even more determined to guard against them. Sora's life must be protected at all costs.

* * *

><p>They'd co-existed for eleven years, but the first time Ventus ever saw Sora's face was when the boy looked in a mirror after getting his new clothes. The brunet's delight with them was obvious.<p>

Ventus shut down his senses, and retreated deep within Sora, shaking with fear.

_Sora looks just like_ me.

Except the _me_was complicated.

The part of him that was Ven saw Vanitas' face, his Darkness' form. The colours were off, but the shape was the same.

The part of him that had been Vanitas saw his mirror image, but wasn't that shocked: he'd always looked like Ventus, why shouldn't someone else?

Ventus curled in upon himself and his thoughts became self-recriminations.

_What did I do to him?_

His thoughts went 'round and 'round in circles as he tried to tease out the truth.

Vanitas had looked like him because he was _from_ him. That made sense. But Ventus hadn't joined Sora until the boy was four, long after his physical form had been molded. What were the chances that he would find a doppelganger whose Heart he could rest in?

_Not very likely,_ he thought to himself bitterly. How, then?

If he'd been in his body, a chill would have run down his spine.

That same time Vanitas had been formed; that had to be it. Sora's Heart had touched Ven's, and given him back his stability. But Sora's Heart had been brand new, and defenseless. Was it possible it had imprinted some of Ventus' attributes?

Had Ven taken Sora's blank sheet and scribbled all over it?

Ventus curled up tighter in misery. Sora had done so much for him; saved him twice over from oblivion... He hated the idea that he may have taken away some of the boy's freedom in return.

He stewed in his thoughts for a spell, before eventually uncurling himself and extending his senses again. Nothing could change the past, but Ventus would do his best to guard against the future.

No matter the cost.

* * *

><p>Ventus had been prepared to hate Hollow Bastion when he discovered they were landing back on that world. It had been there that he'd nearly lost Sora for good, and his failure to protect his Host still rankled. He had nothing but bitter memories of the place.<p>

Or so he thought.

As they walked along the crumbling streets, sometimes something would catch his eye and feel familiar. He felt like he should know this place, but he couldn't quite put his finger on it.

Ventus felt Sora waving to someone he knew, and scoped out the person they were running towards. The man was tall, dressed in a dark-blue uniform that seemed familiar—_blue eyes and a mass of black spikes_—topped by a head of wild blond spikes.

"Cloud!" Sora called out cheerfully, and Ventus froze, trembling inside Sora's Light, cold in ways even the brunet's warmth couldn't touch.

He pulled himself back slightly, but couldn't bring himself to withdraw completely. He remembered now. When he was ten, when Master Xehanort had come to take him away for training, his mother had been taking care of his little brother, who'd been sick.

A little brother named Cloud.

But their home wasn't Hollow Bastion... He remembered visiting his home as Ven, innocently exploring for the "first time" his childhood haunts. The place had been bustling and prosperous, filled with flowers... It was...

_bzzt_

White noise filled his thoughts. The harder he reached for his home's name, the greater the disruption, the more the tension mounted. He let it go. He looked around Sora's field of vision, and saw echoes of that world, and his chill continued.

Was all that was left of his home this ruined world? What could have happened? When had it changed to this... _Hollow Bastion_.

Sora's exchange with Cloud was brief, and the moment it was over, Ventus wished desperately he'd paid more attention. As Sora turned away form Ventus' brother, questions filled his mind.

_Does he know about me? What did Mom tell him? Is Mom still alive? Is _Dad_ still alive?_

What about those kids I met here as Ven? Lea and Isa? Did they make it?

What about my friends on other worlds? What happened to them when the Darkness came?

If Sora had discovered any of these answers, Ventus had slept through them. The brief recap the group had made, before discovering the erasure of Jiminy's journal, had told him nothing. He felt like he was reading a book for which he only had half the pages. It was frustrating.

For a moment, a brief, fleeting moment, Ventus was tempted to try to take control; to hunt Cloud down and demand his answers.

The impulse terrified him, and he buried himself deep within Sora's Heart, blocking out the rest of the world until he was certain they'd already left Hollow Bastion. He wouldn't risk temptation.

His life may be lost, but he refused to steal Sora's.

* * *

><p>Seeing Hercules had been a joy, even if the hero had fallen into a slump with the destruction of the Coliseum. Ventus remembered training there with Herc and Zack, and was sad to see it ruined—just like Hollow Bastion. At least Herc had Megara and Phil to take care of him; to show him not all was lost.<p>

Ventus didn't have time to dwell over it though; he was more concerned with the thief's words, and what they did.

Sora never noticed, the shift was far more subtle than in Twilight Town, but when the guy in the black coat had called Sora "Roxas", the unmerged pieces had twitched.

That was all, nothing else, but Ventus took note, and tried to keep his worry from flaring.

The Coliseum wasn't the only world Sora visited that Ventus recognized. When they reached the Magic Kingdom, he remembered the passports to Disney Town Scrooge McDuck had given him, and meeting Queen Minnie during the Festival of Light. He remembered the ice-cream machine, and "Captain Justice"—which suddenly clicked was _Pete _whom they'd seen casing Yen Sid's Tower.

Ventus grinned to himself, and let the familiar sights wash over him, basking in Sora's amazement at the wonders of each new world his Trinity visited. Ven had felt that wonder too.

Seeing Maleficent when they returned to Hollow Bastion had been an unpleasant surprise—he remembered her cruel words about Terra—, although he couldn't help but be grateful to her for saving Sora. Funny, how she would throw them through a Portal to safety, just like Terra had done for Ven when Master Eraqus had tried to kill him.

When he saw the photo their mysterious guide left them with, he almost wished she had left them for the Nobodies.

There Ventus stood, an easy smile on his face surrounded by those three kids from Twilight Town—except he knew it had never happened.

Those pieces shifted again, and Sora spoke.

"His name is Roxas."

Sora didn't understand what it meant, but with a virtually audible click, everything slid into place for Ventus.

He'd been piecing together what a Nobody was from the trio's various conversations during their journey—he'd apparently missed some vital information during one of his retreats at Twilight Town or Hollow Bastion.

Nobody's were shallow copies of people who became Heartless.

Nobody's looked almost identical to their originators.

Sora looked like Ventus, therefore his Nobody would look like Ventus.

The boy in the photo was Sora's Nobody, Roxas.

The pieces Sora lost had been returned.

Roxas was those pieces.

Ventus felt a surge of pity rise through him. Based on the photo, Roxas had had his own life before he'd somehow rejoined Sora's Heart. He'd created an identity of his own; no wonder he stirred whenever his name was mentioned, whenever he saw someone he knew.

How was he any different from Ventus?

Ventus curled himself around Roxas, and gave him the equivalent of a hug; a thank-you for not trying to tear Sora—his self—apart.

_What...? Who...?_

For a moment, it was as if the world dissolved, and then the two identical boys stood facing each other within Sora's Heart.

Except Roxas wasn't wearing the clothes from the photograph; he was wearing an Organization coat. Ventus tensed, but didn't make any aggressive moves.

Roxas also wasn't quite so comfortable facing his doppelganger. He immediately summoned a keyblade—no, two keyblades!—and put himself into a defensive stance. The Nobody's eyes narrowed. "What are you? You're not part of Sora."

Ventus held his hands up disarmingly, trying to prove that he had no intentions to fight. He could always move away from Roxas' sections of Sora's Heart; he doubted the other boy had that mobility. Gracelessly, he plopped down on the stained-glass floor—

_shards floating up into the darkness as his Heart fell apart_

—leaning back on his hands with his legs splayed apart.

"Consider me a house-guest," Ventus quipped with a grin. "What about yourself? What's your place in the grand scheme of things?"

Roxas scowled, and didn't lower his guard. He certainly didn't join the other blond in his sprawl. He began circling, exploring the Station, keeping an eye on the other.

"Why should I tell you anything? 'House-guest'? What does that even mean?"

Purposefully letting Roxas maneouver out of his line of sight, Ventus kept his tone _extremely_ casual as he responded. "It means I was invited to stay as a guest, long before you ever existed." A sudden stillness to the air indicated that Roxas had come to a stop behind him. "And you're gonna explain yourself to me, because otherwise I'll excise you from Sora's Heart and crush you, even if I have to sacrifice my Self to repair the damage." Ventus didn't actually think he could pull that off, but what Roxas didn't know...

Ventus only had a few seconds to curl himself into a ball and dodge the sudden strike Roxas had made. He rolled to his feet and ran a few steps before turning back to face the Nobody. His grin had become a little more feral—more Vanitas than Ven—but he still refused to summon his own Keyblade.

He tsked the other boy. "That wasn't very nice. And here I was thinking we could be friends."

Roxas, in the middle of rearing back for another strike paused for a moment, frozen like a statue. He allowed his Keyblades—Oathkeeper and Oblivion from the looks of it, Sora's then—to dissipate, and pulled up his hood before turning away. He sat down suddenly, arms and legs crossed, hunched over himself. "Nobody's don't have friends," he bit out sullenly.

A sharp pang hit Ventus' heart, and he closed his eyes, hand curling around the Pathfinder he didn't have within Sora—that was stuck with his physical body.

He walked over, and sat down himself, mischievously leaning against Roxas' curved back. Surprisingly, the other boy didn't even flinch.

"Why not?"

From beneath his hood, a disbelieving snort escaped. "We're only partial people, who wants to be friends with a shade?"

Ventus was silent for a moment, contemplating the blackness that stretched on to infinity above them.

"I used to be just half a person, too, y'know?" he confessed, wanting to give the other boy hope. "I travelled from world to world, and I made a lot of friends, which was great... But I wasn't _whole_ so it never seemed to be enough. I was still lonely."

Roxas twisted around, whipping his hood down to get a better look at the other blond. Of course, this resulted in Ventus falling flat on his back when his "chair" shifted away from him.

"You're not part of Sora." It wasn't a question.

Ventus smiled, comfortable in his supine position. "Nope."

Roxas frowned, his forehead furrowing as he tried to figure out the other boy.

"But you're... whole, now?" The Nobody had shifted so he was kneeling, looming over Ventus.

Ventus closed his eyes, letting himself luxuriate in the seamless planes of his own Heart.

"Yeah."

"Then why are you here?"

_darkness and falling to pieces, his shelter ripped away—vaguely joined shards beginning to fracture once again, and even had Ventus survived the worlds would have been uglier without that boy's light_

"You have to ask?" Ventus opened his eyes, and the sadness within them hit Roxas hard. The kneeling boy looked away. Ventus slowly sat up, drawing his knees to his chest, and looking out into the distance, beyond Roxas.

"Sora's Heart... He... Sora loves everybody, but holds no-one. He'll shelter, but not trap. Being here... It's like..." Ventus searched for words he'd never thought he'd have to explain. "It's like... He's _important_, Roxas," he locked eyes with the Nobody, begging the other boy to understand. "I _choose_ to be here, because it's the only thing that makes sense. Doesn't he make you feel whole? Don't you _want _to be a part of what he is?"

But Roxas didn't look as if he understood; didn't light up with a sense of recognition. Just maintained that frustrated and puzzled look.

For a while, they just sat there, staring beyond each other, unable to connect. Eventually, they retreated back to their own separate existences.

They were just too different.

* * *

><p>The first time Sora had tried to access his drives and found only darkness, Ventus panicked.<p>

Sora didn't have a lot of Darkness in him, but he wasn't like the Princesses; he did have some. Suddenly, it all came to the fore, and the last time Ventus had felt anything like this, Vanitas had been born, and Ven had nearly been lost—

Except Sora's Darkness didn't stream away from him, it curled back around him in whisps, and transformed him into a near-Heartless creature. His Light fell into a trance, but never fully reliquinshed control.

The results were devastating.

Sora's usual fighting style was rough, and maybe a little wild, but there was an element of control to it. He tried to do the most damage with the least hits, and to protect himself, Donald, and Goofy from enemy attacks.

The Darkness made him... feral. He simply attacked; no control, no care, just _fightfightfight_. His Light kept him from harming innocents, but it was barely Sora there anymore. Even the Keyblade stopped responding to his calls, and he was left fighting just with his Dark.

It was terrifying.

It was beautiful.

By the time Sora re-emerged, the magic from his clothes having worn off, the boy was covered in scratches and welts where he hadn't bothered to defend himself. No enemies were left. Donald and Goofy crowded around him, and the three huddled together, trying to figure out what went wrong.

Ventus curled himself deep within Sora's Heart again, calming his own panic with the reality of Sora's undamaged core.

* * *

><p>Ventus had finally found a World he <em>loathed<em>.

First, Roxas had attacked Sora's Heart, and Ventus had been powerless to interfere. He'd learned first hand that his threat to the Nobody had been nothing more than a bluff. When the fight was over, when Sora reigned supreme, Ventus had poked at Roxas viciously, trying to confront the other being, but had been summarily ignored. The blond had been left to fume over his helplessness.

Then Kairi had shown up.

When the girl had just run up and thrown her arms around Sora, Ventus was surprised at the emotion that coursed through his Heart.

Envy.

It was such a natural thing to want; physical confirmation of someone's safety when they had been in danger. Ventus couldn't have that. He didn't _have_a body anymore, he couldn't hug or be hugged. Couldn't get a pat on the back, or punch at the shoulder. He would never fight or fly or run again.

And he would never really know Sora.

Sora, who didn't even know he existed; Sora, who protected him so selflessly but had never even shaken his hand. Ventus was an inextricable part of the Keyblade wielder's life, but he also _wasn't_a part of it at all.

So when Kairi flung her arms around Sora and held him tight; when Sora returned the hug hesitantly, then with more conviction, and a feeling of _warmthsafetyhome _flowed through him, Ventus only felt the bitterness of what he would never have.

Then he'd seen Ansem, and he felt like crying because he knew _Terra_ was trapped somewhere in there, and he wanted his big brother to hold _him_ tight, and tell him everything was going to be okay, that they'd find a way—and this time he wouldn't brush his hand off his shoulder or push Aqua away and the three of them wouldn't be _broken_—

Except Ansem didn't appear to care for Sora's gratitude—_a Heart that could forgive anyone_—and was stalking away.

Kairi was running, but this time away from Sora, grabbing Ansem's hand—

"Riku! Don't go!"

—and Ventus lost something else he loved.

* * *

><p>He should have known that Terra wasn't present, if he'd looked into "Ansem's" Heart like he had back during that confrontation at Kingdom Hearts, he would have seen the solitary Heart within that Body, and it didn't belong to either Terra <em>or<em>Master Xehanort. He didn't know what became of either of them.

Now, the real Ansem—Ansem the Wise— was gone, and Riku was back to normal. Ventus could feel the exhiliration flowing through Sora, but couldn't share it. It's not that Ventus begrudged Sora his happiness, he'd finally found all of his friends and the end of his journey was within his grasp, but Ventus couldn't help but be a little bitter at the hand _he _had been dealt.

Sora had everything, but all Ventus had was Sora.

He wanted to curl back up in Sora's Light, just go back to sleep and forget. But he had to see this through.

* * *

><p>When Xemnas called forth the power of Kingdom Hearts, Ventus thought for sure that the χ-blade was going to materialize for a moment. All that happened was that Xemnas disappeared, and that strange door materialized.<p>

The battle was tough, especially with Mickey and Kairi locked outside, but Ventus felt the warmth of victory when it was over. He shared Sora's jubilation, and couldn't even begrudge the laughter that his Host tricked out of Riku. The blond may not have done anything, but he'd been emotionally invested, and now maybe he could rest again.

"Xemnas, there's more to a Heart than just hatred and rage. Don't you remember?"

Aqua, her voice carried to him by the wind in that dead and dusty world, _What is Darkness but hatred and rage?_

Xemnas, a Nobody derived from a Body that had held two Hearts just looked at them while fading away. "No," he flatly informed the brunet. "I don't." Then he was gone.

And that made no sense unless _"Ansem"_ didn't remember, and if "Ansem" hadn't been able to access the memories of either Terra _or_ Master Xehanort, why had he been seeking Kingdom Hearts in the first place? What did that mean for Terra? He started to pull back, to dive into Sora's Heart so he could contemplate this mystery in peace.

Except Roxas stirred one last time.

The moment the Nobody shifted, Ventus' hackles raised, but all he could do was watch as the spectre separated from Sora to talk to the blonde girl who had appeared, Namin.

Ventus was surprised by the... congeniality... Roxas displayed when he appeared—it was nothing like the aggression he had projected just a short while ago. Yet, somehow, there was a peace in his eyes, and when he disappeared those broken pieces in Sora's Heart merged as seamlessly as if the Light from Kingdom Hearts had healed him. Sora was truly whole again, with no more risk from his Nobody interfering.

_Now I'm the only threat in his Heart._

Because as much as he cared about Sora, and admired him, the boy and his friends could be so _frustrating_. They _never_ asked the right questions, never knew that the questions even needed to be asked, and Ventus was left _stewing _in his curiosity. Several times he had been tempted to see if he could take control to get the information he so desperately needed, just like that time in Hollow Bastion with Cloud. Each time he managed to restrain himself. He was afraid one day he'd lose that battle. He'd never forgive himself.

He didn't have long to mull on those thoughts, though. Because Xemnas wasn't done yet, was clinging to his half-life with the determination only a Nobody could possess. Mickey, Donald, Goofy, and Kairi had all made it through the Portal before it closed, but Sora and Riku were trapped, left behind to fight alone.

Ventus watched in awe as Sora adapted instantly to the distortions that defied all natural laws, just as he had earlier, with Riku just a step behind him. The closest Ventus had ever come to such seamless teamwork had been with Terra and Aqua that one time in Radiant Garden, and that was nothing compared to this.

Xemnas appeared and disappeared, created copies, switched between magic and physical attacks, and the two boys adapted smoothly to whatever was thrown at them, whittling away at the Nobody's Will.

Then Xemnas grabbed Sora. Magical energy froze his limbs and began crushing his throat, and all of Sora's concentration was directed towards getting just one more breath.

Ventus, experiencing it all _through_ Sora, was just as trapped, just as pressured, and could do nothing to help. They both shared the agony, but experienced it alone. They were both dying, together.

_What was the point of surviving if I can't even save him when _he_ needs _me_?_

Riku cut Xemnas down, the Nobody releasing his hold on Sora and teleporting to the side to avoid true damage. Relief swam through Ventus, and affection welled in his Heart for Sora's best friend. That was right, Sora was never alone even forgetting Ventus' presence: he had friends he could count on. Despite the battle that continued to rage on, despite the attacks that Sora and Riku were making and deflecting in concert now, Ventus closed his eyes for a moment and felt content. He knew they would win this.

Riku took a blow meant for Sora, and Sora borrowed Riku's Keyblade. When the time came for the final blow, it was the Kingdom Key that was pointed directly at Xemnas, but with both Sora _and _Riku's Hearts giving it power.

Master Xehanort had done so much harm, used _Ventus_ to do so much harm, and Xemnas was created from the old man _and_ Terra; the blond felt—no—he _knew _that he had to help finish it. So through Sora, he reached out his own power and added it to the strike, the three of them together pouring their Light into the Nobody.

Xemnas' last words struck a chord with Ventus, and a weight of dread settled within him.

"Cursed... χ-... blade..."

It seemed the Nobody had more of Master Xehanort's memories than he'd realized. He'd sensed Ventus' contribution, and it left the boy chilled. He was glad the Nobody was finished; he never wanted to be a pawn again.

* * *

><p>Sora's Light slowly but surely warmed him through again as they travelled through the Dark Realm. Ventus curled himself around Sora's Heart, just like he had in Hollow Bastion, but this time just for the pure comfort the position offered. This way he could bask in the Light, but still see the outside world.<p>

He watched as Sora and Riku stumbled through repairing their friendship, no apologies or forgiveness actually given, but felt on both sides all the same.

Ventus half expected a pang of jealousy—

_I'm asking you, as a friend, just... put an end to me._

—but instead was just warm. Things with Terra and Aqua had gotten rocky at the end, but so had things between Sora and Riku. Maybe this meant the three of them would have been able to smooth things over if they'd been given the chance; fixed things properly.

Maybe Aqua and Terra would still have that chance with each other.

And Ventus would be with Sora, the boy who didn't know him, but loved him unconditionally.

There were worse fates.

* * *

><p>For the first time, Ventus saw Sora's home. It was familiar, but he didn't recognize it. He assumed some knowledge had seeped through while he was sleeping.<p>

It was bright, sunny, and peaceful. It was _warm_ and welcoming. It suited Sora perfectly.

Ventus watched with Sora and Riku as they leaned against the paopu tree and observed the sunset. There was no threat, no battle to go rushing off for, no training for a master that would never be satisfied.

It was time to rest.

* * *

><p>end<p> 


	2. Deleted Scenes

**Disclaimer**: Kingdom Hearts is the property of Square-Enix and Disney. I don't own it, nor do I pretend that I do. Even if I did, the army of lawyers that would come after me would make me change my mind. Title shamelessly stolen from the Old Babylonian title for the Gilgamesh epic.

He Who Saw the Deep - Deleted Scenes  
>A Kingdom Hearts Fanfiction<br>By Jade Dixon

**Note on Canon**: You MUST read the main fic to understand some of the references in these scenes, although at first glance they might seem unrelated. Naminé's scenes are heavily based upon information from Chain of Memories and Kingdom Hearts II, while Roxas' scene comes from near the end of Kingdom Hearts II, although there IS a vague reference to a MAJOR SPOILER for 358/2 Days.

* * *

><p><em>Naminé's scenes - Take place after Chain of Memories, and partially during the beginning of Kingdom Hearts II. Were originally immediately after Ventus is described as going to sleep around Sora's Heart after Castle Oblivion.<em>

* * *

><p>Naminé didn't understand why it was so difficult to piece together Sora's memories. She had known it wouldn't be easy, but his Heart seemed to be actively rejecting her touches.<p>

It was easy to break the Chains of his memories; after all, that was the purpose of that strange Castle where she came into Existence. Nobodies, without a Heart to focus on, seemed to be immune, but Somebodies all, without fail, fell into Oblivion. Naminé was capable of guiding that fall within the Castle, and her connection to Sora allowed her to reconstruct as well.

Or at least, she thought it would; after all, she'd had no problems placing the false memories. Once they'd left Oblivion, and were safe from the Organization, Sora's Heart resisted her touches, and she couldn't figure out _why_.

"What progress have you made?"

DiZ stood behind her, his approach was silent, but noted by the mere presence of his Heart. She pursed her lips in frustration, and lowered her sketchbook. The pages were blank.

"I cannot reach him," she murmured, eyes downcast in a show of sorrow. "His Heart must recognize my touch, and it's rejecting all of my efforts to reassemble the chains."

"Did he not give his consent? Why would he resist becoming whole?"

She could feel his suspicion. It had been a month, and nothing had been accomplished at all. She shook her head slowly from side to side.

"He may have meant what he said, but Hearts are complex things... Perhaps deep down, he did not truly trust me."

The red-robed man frowned beneath his wraps, and brought up the terminal display within the pod room. He shut it down just as quickly.

"Bah. Rouse him, then. Perhaps once he's interacted with you more his Heart will let you do your work."

Naminé froze. She stood up from where she had been curled on the floor facing Sora.

"No."

There was a heavy silence for a moment. She could feel the other man's rage building as he tried to tamp it down. He needed her too much to strike out.

"You dare to defy me?" It was quiet and dangerous.

She turned to face him, her own face blank and serene.

"Sora's memories could not be properly restored with the damage I had previously caused. _All_ of the chains of his memories had to be undone before I could start. Right now, there _is_ no Sora, just a body that sleeps, and many links that can one day make him whole again.

"But not until he'll let me in."

DiZ growled and struck out at the wall with his hand. "If there's no Sora, _how can he stop you_?"

He was waiting for her to slip up, to prove that she was just as unworthy as his betrayers. He wanted an excuse to destroy her, even if it meant he'd lose out on his prize playing piece. Hearts are not rational.

She had no intention of giving him an excuse.

"Sora's willpower is indomitable; even when turned into a Heartless he held onto his identity until Kairi could restore him. His Will keeps me out, even without the memories to back it up."

For a moment, she thought the man was going to protest, to insist she just wasn't trying hard enough, but then he paused, and a smile began to form on his lips.

"Willpower strong enough to function even without memories..."

He eyed her disdainfully, assessing her, and then dismissing her.

"Perhaps another is needed."

She locked her jaw stubbornly. "I am the only one who can do this," she insisted.

"Pfah," he dismissed, pacing back and forth as he puzzled out his idea. "You're weak; barely capable of keeping your Existence stable. What we need is Sora's Nobody."

So close to Sora, she sometimes leeched off his Heart, which was the only explanation she had for the anger that surged through her at the comment. "I _am _Sora's Nobody!" Her identity was all she had, and she wouldn't let even DiZ steal it.

She could see his idea coming to a head, and he'd never been able to stop himself from showing off. He smiled at her as if she were a child throwing a tantrum to the amusement of her parents.

"No. You're a faulty Nobody, created from Princess Kairi's form and Sora's Darkness. You're unstable; weak. You, more than any other Nobody, should not exist. You bend to others' whims too easily, the very antithesis of what a Nobody should be.

"We assumed you were the sole Nobody produced from that atrocity in Hollow Bastion simply because Sora was restored. The memories that would have allowed a proper Nobody to have the Will to Exist would have been prevented from settling; even if one had formed, it should have faded back into the Darkness.

"But Sora, as you said, had an indomitable Will. What if his Nobody survived, even without the boy's memories, even without a Heart? He could be an access point."

DiZ didn't even bother to explain _how _that would work, just smirked at her and walked away. Her borrowed anger faded, and she was left feeling emptier than usual.

When Riku next visited, he was given a new mission.

* * *

><p>The Nobody's name was Roxas, and the Organization had their claws in him right from the start.<p>

Naminé thought she ought to feel resentful of this unknown interloper, but instead she was curious. What was he like? How similar was he to the boy she met so briefly, but knew so well?

Riku struggled to locate and capture the boy, but eventually succeeded in his mission, bringing back the Key of Destiny in an unconscious heap. She could feel the shift in the silver-haired boy, but respected his privacy, and kept silent.

Roxas was seamlessly inserted into DiZ's simulation, and she began work again immediately.

Suddenly, her work was just as she imagined. By routing her powers through Roxas, Sora's Heart allowed her touch, thinking it was its lost pieces trying to return home.

For that's what Roxas was: lost pieces of Sora, that were desperate to be whole again. He wasn't _just_ a Nobody, he was _wanted_. The more Naminé worked, the more she realized just how damaged Sora must have been by the time Kairi restored him. It was a miracle he survived.

And Kairi saved him again.

Naminé was sketching furiously, linking together memories as fast as she could before the Organization found them and kept Roxas from becoming whole. It was something she'd been thinking about a lot, and she was wishing desperately to meet her other Other, the one whose form she took.

Suddenly, there was a glitch in the program, and Roxas fell off the clocktower. Naminé reached out to catch him, that desire still in her mind.

Sora's Heart also wanted to see Kairi, and the double wish connected their Hearts momentarily, and Roxas made contact.

Suddenly, Naminé's hands stopped sketching. She simply froze, her body unable to function as all of her energy focused on _sortinglinkingjoining_, no longer requiring the artistic medium.

The contact was brief, but the progress could not be denied. Not even DiZ had anything snide to say on that day.

* * *

><p><em>Roxas' scene. Takes place during his confrontation with Sora in The World that Never Was. Was originally set just after Ventus' description of Anti-form, before the scene where he states why he loathes The World that Never Was.<em>

* * *

><p>Roxas was struck by grief when Axel sacrificed himself for Sora—no, sacrificed himself for <em>Roxas<em>, only Sora as his container. Since joining Sora's Heart, he'd begun feeling things, and he'd felt sadness when he left Twilight Town, but this was stronger.

He'd trusted Naminé when she'd told him that being with Sora would make him whole, hadn't fought the joining as much as he knew he could have. But he still didn't feel it, didn't feel like he _truly _belonged.

When this grief, leeched from Sora, hit him, his sense of _self_ returned stronger than it had been since he'd found Sora sleeping in that pod.

His sense of self grew so strong that one minute he was silently screaming his rage into Sora's Heart, and the next he was standing Betwixt and Between, staring at the spot of nothingness where Axel had simply ceased to be.

Why?

Why was _Sora _so important? What made people sacrifice themselves for him?

Rage he shouldn't feel as a separate being filled him, and he summoned his Samurai, opening a portal to the Skyscraper. He had his liege-men cut off Sora's followers—even the _dog _had sacrificed himself for the guy once!—and attacked his Somebody.

They were two beings that were truly one, so Roxas didn't even blink when they were sucked into Sora's Heartscape, didn't break off his attack, or show any mercy.

Sora matched him stroke for stroke, his own faced confused, but determined.

"Who are you? Not... Riku?"

Roxas wanted to laugh, but instead snarled, expression hidden by his hood.

"Riku? I defeated a Riku once." Then the bastard cheated on his re-match. Roxas rushed forward, determined to prove he had the right to exist, that he was every bit as good as the other boy.

"Why?" he growled into Sora's face as their Blades crossed and locked. "Why did he choose _you_?" Sora narrowed his eyes, and pushed Roxas back, the other boy turning the momentum into a back-flip. He bent his legs to absorb the force of the landing, then turned the motion into a coil to jump. Roxas used the fact that this place didn't exist in physical reality to assert his Will onto the plane. His jump went high, and he hovered in the air for a moment, surveying the battle-ground.

Sora stood in a ready-stance, determination painted plainly across his face. But it wasn't Sora himself that caught Roxas' attention.

It was Sora's Heart.

The stained-glass floor represented Sora's innermost self, the things that were most important to him.

Naturally, the boy himself featured prominently—self-identity is important to all people.

Surprisingly, it wasn't Sora as he was now, but Sora as he'd been when he left his Islands. It was as if he didn't understand he'd grown, as if the year he'd slept hadn't caught up to him yet.

What surprised him most were the figures held preciously within the protective curl of the sleeping figure's shape. They weren't material items, or representations of Sora's skills.

They were faces. Donald, Goofy, Riku, Kairi.

_Sora loves everybody, but holds no-one. He'll shelter, but not trap._

Roxas wasn't there, of course, because Sora didn't really know him, for all that he was a part of his Heart. Strangely enough, he found that he wanted to be. To be part of someone, who loves so freely, asking nothing in return.

_Doesn't he make you feel whole? Don't you _want_ to be a part of what he is?_

That strange boy's words suddenly made sense, and a peace settled in him that had been lacking before. Finally, he _felt _whole.

"I see," he murmured to himself. "That's why."

Even Roxas' Will could only defy gravity for so long, and he sprang into action the moment he landed, crashing a series of blows onto Sora one after the other. The Keyblade Master tried to parry, but with his one Keyblade against Roxas' two, the brunet was forced to merely block.

Eventually something had to give.

Sora's knee buckled, and Roxas pressed his advantage, batting the Kingdom Key away, then rushing to prevent Sora from grasping it. He slammed Oathkeeper into the handle, jamming it against the floor, then levelled Oblivion at Sora's neck. He stood in silent judgement over the other boy.

He waited for Sora to do _something_, to defend his friends from this "enemy's" savage attack. He needed the final proof that adding his strength to Sora would be _worth _his loss of self; that he'd be gaining something greater.

_I couldn't save Axel—or Xi_bzzzzt_—, but Sora would have, would have done_ anything _to keep his friends safe._

He locked eyes with the other boy, willing him to prove him right, to prove that Sora was the right choice, whoever was making it.

Before Roxas' startled eyes, the brunet lowered his head, and reached out his hand pleadingly. Doubt, and crushing disappointment, swelled in his chest.

_Not now!_ Roxas screamed mentally. _You can't do this to me,_now!

And then the Kingdom Key disappeared from where it was pinned beneath Oathkeeper, and Roxas reared back in surprise.

But not enough. Sora hadn't been pleading for mercy at all—he'd simply been reaching out for a power that had already chosen him. And he didn't hesitate to strike Roxas down, to protect his friends.

Roxas staggered forward slightly, going just beyond Sora as his knees gave out. He gathered the last of his Will to force himself back to his feet, a small smile gracing his face.

He turned to look over his shoulder to see his Somebody one last time. His hood had fallen back, so he was able to look at Sora face to face for once.

"You make a good Other," Roxas confided as Sora returned to consciousness in reality, and his own awareness slipped from him.

He'd awaken only once more, and then only to cement his one-ness with Sora, and to say good-bye to Naminé.

But he was happy now. He was whole.

* * *

><p>end<p> 


End file.
